Men at Work

Did a bit more tidying and cleaning in the downstairs front room today, and then Steve got some back-boxes into the walls ready for finishing the re-wire. Ben was very eager to help!! I loved seeing their respective toolboxes next to each other, and watching Ben get his drill out when Steve got his out, and likewise for the hammer and screwdriver. He really is his father's son, as much as he is a mummy's boy most of the time. I mentioned to Steve that if Ben is going to be picking up things like fixing bikes (he was "fixing" my bike earlier) we should probably make sure we don't just teach him enough to be dangerous!

This morning I remembered what it was like to not have children - Ben was looking after Steve and I managed to get up and washed and fed and dressed and out the door and then walk to a prayer meeting within the hour. Quite an achievement - but utterly possible when you don't have a small child to feed and dress as well. Most enjoyable. I'm not sure when the next time I'm going to get chance to do that again will be!

Am exhausted again though, I'm not sleeping very well at the moment for various reasons and last night I also had to get up to deal with a boy who had leaked and needed the toilet and then find clean pyjama bottoms and sort him out. I even had a conversation with Steve about it at the time but he remembered nothing this morning!! I could really do without that kind of thing to have to deal with at night right now, I need some better sleep than this so that I can cope with Ben during the day. (Today isn't his fault, I've been hoovering again which I KNOW I shouldn't be doing. But I stopped when I'd had enough, I didn't push on and finish the job this time!) I can cope with Ben climbing into bed with us, but the deal was that HE came and found US and WE didn't have to actually get out of bed to go fetch HIM and re-settle him or whatever. This was not in the deal!! Baby will just be in bed with us so I won't have to get out of bed to feed him at night, and while Steve has some time off for paternity leave I'm hoping he'll be up for doing some of the night-time nappy changes at least.

Dinner time soon and it can't come soon enough. I've had a SERIOUS case of the munchies today and my blood sugar has been running a bit high as a result of wanting fruit and scones and milky ways. Not been feeling the peppers and houmous love today. I even made the scones, not made scones in a while. They're alright too! Sadly all the takeaways we fancied (Chinese or Thai) were closed, must be on holiday or something, so Steve is being forced to concoct some kind of carbonara type thing which I'm actually quite relieved about because I at least know how many carbs are in that as opposed to a plate of pad thai.

Bath and bed after that if Ben will let me and not scream the place down if I have a bath just as he needs to go to sleep. He'll have to let Daddy put him to bed I think. As long as he does a wee first....... *sigh*






I thought I'd expand really briefly on Thursday's ponderings about where do I as a mum fit in in the wider church life. I wasn't comparing myself to anybody except Steve really though! He is finding his place in church, stepping up, finding where he fits. I suddenly felt like the less visible of the two of us - and when you feel like you're the less visible, it's very easy to suddenly feel INvisible. Whether that's the truth or not, it's how I felt on Thursday. It didn't last though (the identity crisis) as I finally realised that I am exactly where I am meant to be at the moment! My current role as wife and mother is just as important in church life (which is what my thoughts were based around) as the set-up team, the bands, the preaching, the refreshments, the kids work. I'm helping bring up the next generation of Life and it's a role that has been entrusted to me. I am me, I am who I was created to be, and to try and be something that I am not will just result in me feeling inadequate as I try and compare myself to others! It was pointed out to me today that I am not as invisible as I thought I was on Thursday, I just open up better in habitats more suited to me ;0)