Waiting

Thursday was a waiting day and the first day I've spent entirely on my own since B died.

I went to bed early on Wednesday night for a nap and instead of getting up again I stayed in bed all evening, which I prefer not to do. As a result I was awake reading in the middle of the night. So annoying.

I had a quiet morning thinking about hymns, songs, eulogy words etc for the funeral and reading. I then ended up monging in front of the telly most of the day til 2. I went to Stony to collect a lovely bouquet of flowers sent from work, to do a few jobs and to clear out B's fridge and put her bins out. A neighbour of hers knocked and then talked at me (uninvited) for 20 minutes about herself and her ailments and how her family are so far away. I was polite and listened without inviting her in but could have done without it. She was kind though and said all the neighbours are saddened and how B was too young to die and if I needed to talk....

I then tried to swim in the outdoor pool which is supposed to be open daily til 8pm until the schools go back. I know it was a bit colder (16C) but I was annoyed to find it locked at 5pm. I can understand that few people, if any, want to swim when it's not brilliant sunshine but I did and I have a paid for season ticket and I was cross they didn't contact me or put anything on their web page.

So I tried a new indoor pool near me, which was fine but a little less relaxing than being able to float and watch the clouds and birds and it is too warm for my taste (but not as warm as MH pool, which is good). It's very close to home so I will start to use it now autumn is coming. I only did 14 lengths but that was enough especially as I have a sore throat coming on and probably should have steered clear anyway!

I called the undertakers but B's body still hasn't been released to them. They're going to make enquiries of the Coroner's office again for me.

When I got home I did like the night before and went to lie down and only got up at midnight to put the bins out!