Off Camera

"Well, OK. I will answer a few questions, so long as it's for a reputable publication.

"Yes, I am this lamb's mother. No, I wasn't on Lambing Live with a camera peering at my important bits and Kate Humble stalking me round the lambing shed in case I pushed a bit. No, that's a farm on the other side of the village.

No, I don't know Hamish and Susie Dykes personally, but I know a ewe who knows a ram who knows a lot of ewes who know them. They're very nice, but I don't belong to them.

No, this lamb wasn't delivered live on BBC2, back to front, upside down,with a close following twin, assisted by the Dykes children or on the night shift, or anything else interesting. I just dropped the lamb without a fuss! I'm not famous at all. You must have zillions of photos like this. But thanks for blipping us anyway!"