It's A Lock-In!

HAAAAALP!

WE ARE LOCKED IN!

My Dear Princess & Dear Fellows, I am not joking. 

I went to open the door today because the grocery delivery van had just arrived. I turned the lock. 

Door STILL locked. 

I tried to UN-turn the lock. 

Seized. Jammed. Stuck. Cuffed. 

PANIC IN THE STREETS!

We came up with the alternate cunning plan of asking the grocery guys to just bung all the bags through the bedroom window. That worked fine, but now we are locked in. Stuck in the house. Imprisoned. But at least we have half a dozen pints of milk and enough bog roll to wallpaper the Louvre. 

I also ordered Jaffa Cakes. So snackwise, I am covered. I'm actually feeling pretty good about the timing of this thing.

Caro called Miranda about it. Miranda is our landlady and she "has a man" for everything. So naturally she has a locksmith who is on his way now. But first, she asked us if we had tried unlocking the door from the outside. 

No, Caro replied, but that was an EXCELLENT idea. Let me just bung my husband oot the windae, she said. So, five minutes ago, I was most ungracefully negotiating my way out of the same bedroom window through which the groceries had just gained entrance.

There was a lot of "oof!" and "careful!" and "...maybe if I just try..." and "ooooh, me bum-bone!" But eventually I made it out there. In the pouring rain. With a key in one hand, and a thing of WD-40 in the other.

Seized. Jammed. Stuck. Cuffed.

Good to know. Thanks Miranda, thanks for your brilliant idea. My bum-bone thanks you too.

Caro is now tidying the house for the arrival of the locksmith. Because as we all know, locksmiths will COCK A SNOOK at fixing the locks of messy houses. 

As for me, I'm good. Resting up, drying out and reaching for the Jaffa Cakes. I reckon I can survive this lock-in for a couple of months.

S.

p.s. Isn't this an adorable picture of the lads? I took it this morning, in the detritus of their morning play-session where they tipped over their toy basket. Caro took it and posted it on her Instagram. And if you are not following hashtag punkyandjasper on Instagram, you really should. Caro takes much better pictures than I do.