Still

Well yesterdays incident made me take stock again. I'd been feeling so much better maybe I had let some things slip, whilst my anxiety about the Solar plexus and dr's appointment were still bubbling away! So I  sat down and read the 50 tools to stop anxiety and panic on my phone app! I had read articles about various aspects but had never found the full list of the 50 things before. What a wonderful and helpful list! I'd forgotten abou the elastic band trick - put one on your wrist and ping it whenever negative thoughts occur. Oh happy pinging day! 
I also liked the Worry Box - visualise a box with a lock and put in it all the important / unimportant, controllable/  uncontrollable thoughts. The box I had picked up from the recycling Center  a while ago is now my physical and metaphysical box! I have also put in there all the negative emotions and kept their opposite positive ones! 
I also listened to the audio on how to tolerate anxiety - and for the first time I fully recognised the need to just be with the anxiety - acknowledge it and just let it be. I've not been successful with that up to now - I was just manically doing other things to take my mind off it. So now I think of the Paul simon words  " Hello darkness my old friend." 
I spent the afternoon peacefully and then made my way to the hens for their bedtime. Always good to be with the hens - even though it was raining!