Your Diamonds are Drops of Rain

Last night I was sitting on my chair... (one of the many, Tooli), and the Fat Cat jumped up on my lap for a cuddle.  

We had the ears, we had the chin, we had the "pre-kill you" throat rub, and then she got fed up and walked away from me to have a wee look out the window. 

As she turned, I noticed a wee bit of golden string stuck to the back of her leg.  I put my hand out to brush it off, but it didn't move, and as I caught it, her tail shot straight in the air.....

And then I could see where the string was coming from. 

O M G 

I was completely and utterly horrified. 

I sat there, on the edge of my chair for ten minutes til my Beloved came back from the Scout hall. 

"Si", I said, "Something tragic, and awful". 

Immediately I saw his brain go into overdrive. I could see him checking my body, and my face, and could see him relax when he saw nothing had happened to me. "What", he said. 

"really, really, bad", I said, "what is going through your head right now?"

He started glancing round the room, all over the floor, under the chairs, into the dining room. 

"Cat poo" He said. 

"Close" I said. "Lift up Beau's tail"  I said. 

And he did. And Laughed out loud. 

Then he went and just yunked it out of her bum like it was nothing while I ran round squealing and squeezing my buttocks together. 

After he sterlised his hands (To be truthful, only two fingers touched the bit of string, so the whole sterlization of clothes and everything was a bit extreme...), he came back in and we pondered how much other christmas wrapping she had eaten. 

What I want to know is, how come only half of it came out?