Evolution of the species.

This image is to prove that although I consider myself quite modern in my outlook, I have indeed retained my Neanderthal hunter gatherer instincts, hence the recyclable hemp shopping bag and credit card balanced by the effete arm position.

I sincerely believe we have evolved from Apes. The thought doesn't upset me as it seems to offend other people. I have many ape characteristics, watch any wildlife film involving silverbacks with baby gorillas and Mrs Booty will take a sideways look at me and smile.

To prove that my instincts may be primordial but improving I admit that 'O Mio Babbino Caro' can bring me to tears. The joy our grandsons create cannot be replicated, thus those special moments with them move me, yet I retain the ability to laugh when times are dark.

Please spend 2.42 listening to perfection, then read on. Angela Gheorghiu.

In Puccini's aria, the Ponte Vecchio which crosses the River Arno in Florence is mentioned; pause a moment. Twenty years ago two very dear friends, a married couple, died within ten days of each other, one committing suicide days before the other died of a terminal illness, they could not bear to be parted. Such an experience can leave scars, mental scars, Mrs Booty and I learned a lot from that experience. One major thing is that money, gold, the Gucci things in life are not worth anything if you are unhappy or unwell. Back to the Ponte Vecchio, the two children of our friends took their ashes to Florence, their favorite city, went to the Ponte Vecchio at dawn and mixed the two urns of ashes into one stream as they were poured into the river. Together forever.

When the son and daughter returned we sat over a glass or three of very good uisge beatha; mellowed after their journey they told me about what had happened on the bridge. We sat in silent contemplation for some seconds, I then looked at them and said, "You daft pair, your Dad couldn't swim." At which point we all burst into tears and drowned our sorrows with huge smiles on our faces.

So I keep trying this evolution thingy. I open doors for people of both sexes, you never know when you may get lucky; I change and bathe our boys, I do all our housework and cooking. However, I put my foot down at breast implants; I don't need them, manboobs are a natural thing, you either have them or you are unlucky.