WHERE'S THE RED BALLOON?

You might well ask?

Yes well, I went down town with the express purpose of buying a jumbo pack of red balloons...

Returned home with a few really dumb photos and a rat-tailed file!

It has ever been thus - once when I was about 14, I went upstairs for a pee. Then I cleaned my teeth got undressed & put my pyjamas on - only to realise it was 2 pm...

No RED BALLOON!