Spot the Ball (again)

The first home game of the season. Against the nearest and dearest too! To tell the truth (why bother - I'd just be as well to make up some bollocks) it was a bit of an even contest. Not much in it either way. That was until young Sam Nicholson scored a goal that was more than a bit special. So, both teams got a player sent off, the Leithers missed a penalty and we ran out 2-1 winners.
Anyway, as we walked back to the howff forra beer, I wondered aloud if we were top of the table. Surely we must be, having beaten both Rangers and Hibs in our opening two fixtures. Jeesus! Queen of the South and Raith Rovers are above us. What sort of weird parallel universe have the Hearts ended up in?