Softness and aggression

One of my friends at lunch today remarked, "You look quite pissed off today. What happened?" "Do I?" I wondered. I didn't think I was but it must have been the process of change that was set into motion last night. There is a whole lot of uncertainty, and much that I have no control over. Any change along with excitement brings along apprehension. That has to be the reason.

The evening at the table today was just incredible. It began slow, I began slow. I was in no mood to fraternize. I just wanted to play. I began with a series of losses at doubles where attempting to get my eye in. All my good shots were missing by inches. I wasn't seeing the ball quite as well as I wanted to and neither was the body responding as I needed. Somehow, table tennis reinforces to me that each day is a new day. And I cannot carry preconceptions or expectations from myself based on the last few days. I need to work myself up almost from scratch. Give in my very best and enjoy the moment that gets created in the process. Some days it will be tougher than others and one cannot be forewarned.

But one can only lose so many times. Everything just changed after a while of persevering. All it takes is the player to become one with the game. The eyes are transfixed upon the ball, the body responds only through subconscious reflexes and time expands. Victories are the only natural consequence. Thanks in part to the bits of apprehension of course. Sport, as I have said before is perhaps the best way to dissipate aggression. An evening to remember.