An empty glass .

It is 18.30 ,a Saturday night and no G& T poured or wine glass full. ( Don't often see that so I blipped my glass .)

WHY ?

You may well ask .. It is because I am driving in a few hours time .(and 8 hours bottle to throttle is the rule .) I am heading for the PP, (the Privy in the Peaks ,) (or BB as it has been known , emmmm Buxton Bog BLOCK ) teehee .

I have a small cottage in my daughter garden . Well actually it is a toilet block . She has the school house and I have the school toilets across the yard . . hummmmm . It is converted and sort of a granny flat . I call it the Privy , but as it is in a small village near Buxton , those that wish to wind me up and tease me call it the Bog Block ..

AAAAAAANY way , I am heading for the PP for a few days before I take my flight to Ko Samui , in the gulf of Thailand .

I have soooooooo much to do and think about ,as I am Little Miss disorganized sometimes and I don't want to forget anything .. I have loaded up the car and it is true , as I didn't disprove it . 3 into 1 WONT GO . HURUMPFT . I have had to do a bit of jiggery pokery , and stuff things under the seats , but the main case MINE is in the boot .(Poor boys , a pair of trunks and flip flops will have do them . ;-)

I have packed far to much I am sure . You see I don't wear clothes , I wear Outfits . So every thing has to co -ordinate and it can be a real nightmare .But there is no one to tell me off but me .so I can take as much as I like . emmmmm I wonder if I can stuff in one more pair of shoes ;-).

I have decided to turn the AGA off . I never turn it off as I am always scared I wont be able to turn it back on again .But I have decided that I can save 6 weeks worth of oil if I do which will give me more money for my holidays . Good thinking or what . ?

I once emmmm nearly blew the AGA up (and me ) when tried to light it ., and it was precisely 4 hours before I had some friends for lunch .

Actually I did blow it up .

The table was set , and oooo it looked divine . I love setting my table and take pleasure from eating at a decorative one . As I was preparing my fish tart , I realized that there didn't seem to be much heat coming from the AGA . I glanced at the pilot light and BLOW ME DOWN , it was all blown out . It was only a couple of years old at the time and had NEVER gone out . (I am still not sure why it did )

Time was of the essence as It can take a full 24 hours for it to get up to full heat and my tarts needed full heat ..
Having no time to find a manual , I just grabbed some matches , and used my initiative . I pumped some oil lit a match and shoved it through a match lighting type of hole . EMMMMMMM
NOTHING .
SOOOOOOOOOOOOO
I pumped some oil , lit a match , shoved it in again and
emmmmmmmm NOTHING .
With panic rising within me whilst envisaging my lady friends turning up expecting a delicious lunch iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

PUMPED more oil , lit another match and YIPPEE YI AYYYYYYYY it lit .

I started to charge about like a blue AR... emm bottomed fly , putting the finishing touches to the themed white place settings , I turned around on hearing an ENORMOUS BANG , saw a black soot cloud come out of every orrafice of the AGA ,which mushroomed up to the ceiling like vision of the atom bomb , and then floated down covering EVERYTHING , including me , but more importantly MY Beautifully set table with BLACK SOOT .

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH

There was no lunch that day , or for the next week , while the insurance people came to survey the scene . Surprisingly the only damage was oil spilt on the red rug All the AGA needed was a good clean and a new wick .
The engineer said I had flooded it with oil and I would be better to read the instructions next time .

"Next time ? " There hasn't been a next time until I come back . OOOOOOO DEAR , may be I shouldn't turn it off after all .