Daisy

The daisy's for simplicity and unaffected air

I received a Sensory Profile Questionnaire in the post this morning from the psychologist. So I filled it in while the house was quiet and there was no one around. It's strange doing something like that and trying to be totally honest - it made me realise how not totally honest I usually am. Not in a dishonest way, but just in a coping and pretending way. You don't usually go around telling everyone just how much everything is bothering you. You pretend.

One question was about wearing bright colours. I ticked a box saying I do like bright coloured clothing sometimes and then thought about what I was wearing and what I have in the wardrobe, and how every time I put on something colourful I take it off again because I feel too flashy. I'm actually scared of bright clothing and usually stick to navy and black, and the odd bit of grey and brown. You might catch me in burgundy when I'm feeling bold.

After a walk on the beach I did some washing and a tiny bit of gardening. I fed the blueberries, camellias and azaleas with ericaceous feed, and found some soft fruit feed for the raspberries. They're not looking great actually. I don't think I have sussed out the secret to growing great raspberries.

I sowed my first seeds of the year today. Just some lettuce and herbs in seed trays. I can't do anything much outside for a while - it's gone really chilly again.

I'm feeling really preoccupied still - wondering what the result of all this assessment will be, and I get overwhelmed by the slightest things. I can't remember the last time I felt I was thinking clearly.

I hope when this is all over and things have settled down I will be able to write again.