Bittersweet

One year ago, we came to this peaceful, playful spot, unaware that A was planning her arrival for the very next day. What a difference a year makes.

Sweet things about today:
E racing to our bedroom yelling, "It's not sleep time, it's morning time Mummy and daddy... Can I have my Cheerios and birthday cake (soreen) and cartoons please?"
The delicate snowdrops.
E carefully choosing a birthday gift for A. Deliberating for half an hour, with constant commentary, "that's too grown up for A, I'd like that, I think A would like these, she likes dogs and roosters (not cows)."
Birthday post arriving. E and A waving adoringly at the courier.
Digging out a box of Summer dresses knowing that Spring will come.
E explaining to A, unprompted, "It's going to be your birthday A and you'll get some lovely presents little darling and maybe a cake as well."
A nestling at my neck when I requested a cuddle.
Feeding A on her last night as an eleven month year old, knowing it will soon be the last time and watching her fall asleep so trusting, so precious, all grown up, yet so small.

Not so sweet things:
Our inability to get to bed before midnight.
C taking a trip to the Drs -prescription already making a positive difference.


Bittersweet things:

The feeling of knowing we'll never experience our first hellos and milestones with A again and of watching her independence grow. The sweetness of this first birthday, the love, pride and joy we feel for our dear, happy littlest girl and the fulfilment of so many moments captured by the journal and all that's yet to be.