FORK HANDLES . . . FOUR CANDLES . . .

FORK HANDLES . . . FOUR CANDLES . . .
Could not resist this as a start to making 2014 ALAM – a laugh a minute - year for you all !
For Blippers who may not know this comedy sketch, part of the script is reproduced below.
Click here to watch the TV sketch.
Have a grand start to 2014 . . . and beyond !

Sporty Bit . . . Boro conceded another goal in the final minute – for the 5th time in 8 games!
Sadly they nearly broke a long-standing record – the team has not won away from home on New Year’s Day in 114 years . . . ALAM !


SCENE - In a hardware shop. Ronnie Corbett is behind the counter, wearing a warehouse jacket. He has just finished serving a customer.
. . .
CORBETT (muttering): There you are. Mind how you go.
(Ronnie Barker enters the shop, wearing a scruffy tank-top and beanie)
BARKER: Four Candles!
CORBETT: Four Candles?
BARKER: Four Candles.
(Ronnie Corbett makes for a box, and gets out four candles. He places them on the counter)
BARKER: No, four candles!
CORBETT (confused): Well there you are, four candles!
BARKER: No, fork 'andles! 'Andles for forks!
(Ronnie Corbett puts the candles away, and goes to get a fork handle. He places it onto the counter)CORBETT (muttering): Fork handles. Thought you said 'four candles!' (more clearly) Next?
BARKER: Got any plugs?
CORBETT: Plugs. What kind of plugs?
BARKER: A rubber one, bathroom.
(Ronnie Corbett gets out a box of bath plugs, and places it on the counter)
CORBETT (pulling out two different sized plugs): What size?
BARKER: Thirteen amp!
. . .