Day 16

Another short post because I can't be bothered to write: I do need to do some proper CBT soon though.

I woke up in a complete state. Maybe I had got Christianity wrong? I was scared of having to be sociable all day. I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want presents. It was horrible. I pretended to be asleep for quite a long time, going round and round in my head why Christianity must be true. God was so faithful and very soon helped me believe. I still felt very low and scared.

My siblings came in and forced me to open my stocking. That helped. I began to feel quite ill which did at least mean I could split the day up with lie downs without seeming rude. I didn't enjoy the day much but I did feel brighter as the day went on. I did notice (slightly to my distress actually) that I was quite good at doing stuff without procrastinating. Maybe I am not too bad...argh. Once I had gone to bed I had quite a relaxing time doing puzzles and listening to the radio with minimal guilt. That was good!