Welcome To The Matriarchy

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellow,

Today was a huge day. I had over-planned. 

Thing 1: I had to make a big batch of courgette and bacon soup for Manda's planned "Soup-Off" at hers at 3pm. 

Thing 2: I had to get ready and go meet Abi at 9:15 so we could take the train to Porirua to meet Shenee. 

The pair of us were due to be picked up there so we could go to the zoo together for a close encounter with lemurs. About a week earlier I'd asked Abi:

"Are you free Saturday morning and do you like lemurs?"

She had replied that this was one of the most random things she had ever heard, but sure. 

So lemurs it was. Briar was also coming because she LOVES lemurs. It is another thing she and I have in common. I had met the ruff-necked lemurs before, but since then Wellington zoo has acquired some boisterous ring-tailed ones. I LOVE them. 

The four of us managed to liaise and entered the enclosure together, very excited. The keeper had us fix up their favourite treat (corn and carrots) and to put some into tennis balls with a hole so they could get the food out. 

"To be honest, they are really lazy and get bored quickly, so don't make it too difficult for them," she advised.

When we entered their enclosure they were STARING at us. Some of them (today's blip) were sunbathing. We could not touch or pet them though. 

"They CAN bite, they never have, but it would be bad," said the keeper. 

So we just let them bounce around us, making little noises and LEAPING from rope to branch to fence and back again. Eating their corn and STARING at us while they did it. 

The keeper told us that we were meeting all males because they are more mellow. It turns out that lemurs live in a matriarchal society so the females are much more assertive and feisty. "Even the lowest female outranks the highest male," said the (female) keeper.

Abi, Shenee and Briar all looked at me. I lowered my head. 

Briar, Shenee and Abi LOVED the experience as did I. I'll put more photos in the extras. After that we spent a couple more hours at the zoo, looking at giraffes and sun bears and red pandas. It was lovely. 

I noted that when I saw an animal, I would gently usher Abi in front of me like I used to when she was little. I mentioned this to her. It was weird, like a habit I'd forgotten I'd picked up. 

"I'm taller than you now," she laughed. "YOU should go in front."

We then went to the Banana Bar. I mention this because it became the running joke of the zoo. "I'll see you in the Banana Bar. Do you think they'll have bananas at the Banana Bar? I might have banana cake in the Banana Bar. Banana Bar Banana Bar."

They did NOT have banana cake or banana splits or banana milkshakes at the Banana Bar. They didn't even have BANANAS at the Banana Bar. 

"One out of ten, would not recommend," said Briar. 

Although we did get free pizza! 

"Someone just came up to me and offered me free pizza!" said Abi, amazed. "Kiwis are SO NICE!" 

THEN SOMEONE ELSE DID IT

Aotearoa, come for Milford Sound, stay for the free pizza.

After this Briar drove Abi and me up to Plimmerton for:

Thing 3: The Soup-Off and Blood on the Clocktower.

Abi finally got to meet all of my mates. Ellie was there! Luke was there! Mo was there! We were all there to taste each other's soups and have a vote on whose soup was the best.

Long story short: Jeff won. BULLSH*T! I demand a recount!

Then it was on to Blood on the Clocktower. I started out with my usual over-dramatic soliloquy and then right into the game. We had three new people in the group (Abi, Ruby and Mo) but it's not a hard game to pick up, plus I'm always on hand to offer advice.

Abi was really good! In her first outing, she impressed me by trying to protect one of the more valuable players on Team Good, and it seemed to work because for once TEAM GOOD WON. 

It was very impressive! 

On her second game, Abi was The Poisoner on Team Evil. And once again she had a great time LYING to people and throwing shade and putting people off-balance. I didn't go around listening to her side-conversations and strategies but whatever she did worked because Team Evil (led by Craigy as the Imp) took the victory.

Abi LOVED it. She had a great time. I got drunk. The day was a complete success apart from SOUP. 

Not that I'm bitter. 

Bullsh*t.

S.