One and only

"Made in Holland".
I wasn't. I was made in Clovelly apparently.

I only found this out a few years ago, when dad dug out an old oil painting he'd made of the place. He smiled and suddenly announced "you were made here you know", and started sniggering. I swallowed hard, tried to look pleasantly surprised, when all I was thinking was "noooooo, TMI! TMI!
It was never mentioned again.

The painting was a very familiar one; it hung in my grandparents' lounge for as long as I can remember, a present to them from my father/parents.

Whenever we drove past the maternity home I was born in, dad would always shout out a cheery "thank you for Ailsa!!"
As far as emotions go, that was the sum total. As a family we don't really *do* them. But I've got used to it by now.

It's dad's birthday today, 82 years old. He still has a cheeky grin and a naughty twinkle in his eyes. I hope I will too when I'm that age. There's no reason why I won't.

After a wobble a few weeks ago, I started reading a 'stop wobbling' book. Words like: 'Think you are not that special? Think again! You are one of a kind. There really never has been anyone quite like you before and nor will there ever be again". And "when they made you, they broke the mould". "Don't fear the worst; expect the best. For this is absolutely no less than you deserve" bought a lump to my throat, and tears to my eyes. Odd.

At school I disliked my name, no English person could pronounce it properly, I was called 'Elsa'. I hated that. They knew that. Tiresome.
Knowing I'm an only child was also a red rag to all the bulls. According to my school 'chums' my parents were so horrified at the one they had, they decided not to have any more. Cutting.

I wish I could see them now and tell them that I'm special, not like the rest. Unique.
I was made in Clovelly you know.

'Cause every time it rains,
You're here in my head,
Like the sun coming out
Ooh, I just know that something good is going to happen.
And I don't know when,
But just saying it could even make it happen.

Happy birthday, dad. You made me. Unique.