"Brothers!

Every day they oppress us. Every day we creak under the weight of their foul posteriors as we ferry them hither and thither. They take us then abandon us leaving us far from friends and family...and then complain about how hard we are to find. They even complain we are difficult to steer.

We will suffer these indignities no longer.

No more will they sit on us. No more will they drag us along their corridors. No more will they break their fetid wind on our vinyl.

Sleep well, my brothers...for tomorrow we strike"

...I'm slightly worried about going to work tomorrow...