"You...

...have been out ALL afternoon..."

Me: Sorry, but I went for a meal with friends. It was D's birthday.

Popeye: You left me with that noisy roof work going on next door. And that new roofing felt is flapping noisily away in the wind.

Me: I saw that when I was coming home. It looks a very botched up job. I have never ever seen roofing felt flapping in the wind before. These guys are being very economical with the roofing felt. By the way, I did notice you slept in my bed all day!

Popeye: Yes, it's warm and comfy. And under the quilt I cannot hear the noise. By the way, did you notice the battening?

Me: Yes I did....

Popeye: It's too far apart. There isn't going to be enough overlap of the tiles when they are put on...

Me: When did you become a roofing expert?

Popeye: My Mum used to walk on that roof at full moon.

Me: I remember. She would be silhouetted with the moon behind her.

Popeye: I used to walk on it as well. I jumped from the garage roof on to that roof. But I tell you now, that roof is not fit for a cat to walk on now, let alone protect humans underneath it.

Me: I noticed something else as I came in?

Popeye: What?

Me: The new roofing tiles that are stacked up on his imprinted driveway. They are green!

Popeye: So?

Me: Everyone else's roofs in the road are red.

Popeye: SO?

Me: My house deeds say very specifically that that the roofing tiles on all these houses in the road have to be red. They have to stay red. They cannot be replaced with another colour...

Popeye: Oops...