Buddy

My Dear Princess and Dear Fellows,

Pregnant BA is back. Smock decided we have too much work on for just me and Lemon, and so hired PBA. 

I should add that she is no longer Pregnant BA. Now she is just BA. But I'm not one to let go of a blipname easily, so PBA it is.

I do not mind PBA but she readily admitted that her whole life revolves around children. This became apparent within 2 minutes of me saying hello when she announced, "What?! You haven't SEEN pictures of Locky yet?"*

She was shocked. Appalled. If I told her that YOU hadn't seen pictures of her sprog either I expect she would faint right away.

The thing is, he wasn't a bad looking little chap. Even so, I wasn't really interested. I'm not interested in children. Even the royal children in the magazines. If there were royal CATS in magazines, that would be a different matter, but unless Meghan has a litter of kittens, I remain aloof.

This is probably why I get on better with Lemon who is resolutely unsentimental about children and still has not showed me a single picture of any of hers. I only just found out the name of her grandson.

"I must stop calling him, 'The Boy'," she admitted. "His name is Samuelu, which is the Samoan form of Samuel. It would be Samuela in the Cook Islands though," Lemon told me. 

This is very confusing.

This was borne out by Lemon's sister reading out a card she had written to Samuelu and his new baby sister recently. 

"Same - Samee - Samee-oo..." she stammered.

"Samuelu!" snapped Lemon. 

"Oh yeah," said Lemon's sister. "So best wishes to you both, Samuelu and Izzla."

"Isla! For f***'s sake!" said Lemon.

I can see now the value in calling them "The Boy" and "The Girl". 

S.

* I also know all about Locky's bowel-movements and breast-feeding patterns and we are only on day 3.