Parallel universe!

Today I took the doggies for a plod in a different area and then decided to swing over by the Portsonachan Edradine back road. Well it was like the land time forgot. The houses verged on something you would find in a horror movie or deep in the Catskill mountains while other houses looked like they belonged to millionaires. I decided in my wisdom to go in search of a chap that works in wood to get a mantle shelf for above my Uist house  fireplace. I got to this strange wee village called Edradine and the first thing I noticed was the entire place was littered with white rabbits! I kid thee not, there's one lurking in the extras. I then drove to the last house on this rickety road and knocked the door for directions, It didn't help that I didn't know the name of the guy I was looking for! Anyway I heard about a dozen bolts being drawn back (never a good sign!) and this wizened wee wuman answers. I ask for directions to the woodworkers house and she says "your'e on the wrong STREET"  I think, is she nuts! there's only one rickety road and it ends here but she said no, go back down and go right at the coal lorry!! and the white rabbits and go to the end of that street! I'm thinking she's nuts, I never saw any street! any way I followed the white rabbits (I'm not making this up!) saw a coal lorry that looked like it had been there forever! and turned up an even narrower road and sure enough, several white rabbits later I found the woodworkers house. Knocked on the door and this huge Hungarian Visula dug just about shot out the window. Finally a woman answered and lo she was American. By this time  I'm thinking  am I on drugs!  Anyways she says Yes I had the right house but her woodworking husband was  working at his yard further down the road. I thank her and proceed to go find the yard at which point I pass a phone box that is you guessed not a phone box but a defibrillator , (you would probably need it at this point then did I no pass an old bloke walking with some kind of hawk on his arm, by this time I'm ready to freak out! 
Finally I find with elusive woodworker and then drove back to his house to look at various bits of wood. His  American wife from Chicago no less makes a lovely cup of tea and the batshit crazy dug likes me. The American it turns out is the exe head of the local primary school & she met the woodworker when he offered her a lift while she was hitchhiking here in Scotland but she was actually born in Glasgow as her mother was Scottish. The white rabbits are wild and are all over the village and I forgot to ask about the old bloke with the hawk!  I then wound my way home and passed an ancient petrol pump !  Honestly you couldn't make this stuff up!
I got the piece of wood which I managed to chip when taking it out the car but it still looks good. Even the roadsigns looked old!
What a day!