Back End Processes

My Dear Fellows & Dear Princess,

Lemon told me she is often called upon to babysit but she has rules for the parent's children. Lemon's rules of babysitting are:

- They have to be able to speak
- I don't wipe arses

The rules are well-known in her family. As a consequence, even the children will announce to her, "You can babysit us Auntie Lemon! I can wipe my own arse and everything!"

It doesn't always work. Kids are not always truthful. She recounted escorting one toddler to the gents and standing by the door waiting for him to return. He was ages.

LEMON: What are you doing in there??
KID: Auuuuuntie Lemon..... Help.....
LEMON: Oh god! You don't know how to wipe your arse, do you?
KID: ...mostly....

I'm in a similar position these days. When it comes to software, I mean. I wasn't trying to say I have trouble keeping clean back there. Look, forget I brought it up.

But today, I was reliant on developers to wipe their own arses when it came to two different software deployments. And they both failed me. 

DEVELOPER: Business analyyyyyst... help...
ME: Oh god. You don't know how to deploy code, do you?!
DEVELOPER: ...mostly....

So I had to help them tidy up their mess, which involved me sending around emails saying, "That thing that we said would be fixed, won't be fixed, we're going to try again next week ooops sorry."

Still. After hearing Lemon's stories, my day didn't seem so bad. And no, I'm not up for babysitting any time soon.

S.