Random Things

My Dear Fellows and Dear Princess,

A number of unrelated things have happened since my last post.

Aglow
Last night me and Er Indoors finished watching the first season of "Glow" and thoroughly enjoyed it. It is about an earnest actress who attempts to find fame as a wrestler. Her alter-ego is an Evil Soviet named "Zoya the Destroyer" who goes around saying "I veel destroy your decadent Am-yer-ic-yan freedomce!" I thought it was very funny. (And based on truth, they claim). 

It is worth mentioning because I enjoy very few modern tv shows and find myself going back to old classics instead. Having said that, one of the main things I love about this show is the fact it is set in the 1980's. It even had Howard Jones on the soundtrack last night. Howard Jones! I ask you. So it's not like I've made a complete break from nostalgia.

Fake!
Today's picture is of the Old Government building (now replaced by the Beehive). I think it looks very impressive, especially because it is made entirely of wood. With the exception of the chimneys which were brick at one time. But when the building was refurbished the fireplaces were removed and the chimneys replaced with fibre-glass ones because they are part of the character of the building. It's owned by Victoria Uni now. 

Bad Blood
Today I attempted to give blood. I spotted a sign in the street and once I'd checked it wasn't Scientologists really, I went along. I mean, I'm as altruistic as the next man.

(So long as the next man isn't Bono or Sting. Bloody do-gooders.)

But it turns out that they couldn't take my blood! I haven't been in the country long enough or something! To be honest I couldn't tell because it was explained to me by a very quietly-spoken lady and I was too busy being AFFRONTED. So as far as I'm concerned what she said was: "We don't want your SMELLY POM BLOOD because we don't want to catch horrific British diseases like 'Brexit' and 'Simon Cowell'."

FINE THEN. 

I'LL TAKE MY BLOOD ELSEWHERE. I HOPE I'VE GOT A REALLY RARE BLOOD GROUP AND DAME KIRI TE KANAWA NEEDS SOME OF MY RARE BLOOD AND SHE CAN'T HAVE ANY OF MY RARE BLOOD AND THEN SHE'LL BE UPSET.

HA.

That will teach them.

Askew
One of my b*llocks made a break for it today. It was my own fault. I wasn't paying proper attention and didn't put them back properly after going to the loo. The whole package just wasn't sitting right, if I'm honest. Walking away from the blood donation fiasco, I could feel the right one heading for the Swiss border but there was NOTHING I could do about it. 

I mean. I tried. Obviously. I tried "walking funny" to jiggle it back in. Then I tried checking around for people and then giving it a discreet nudge, but really, there was nothing to be done. It was headed for the knicker-exit and would not be dissuaded. I had to walk back to work in a state of half-in-half-elsewhere.

It is a good thing I was not wearing shorts.

I don't know if women are aware of the trials and tribulations of being a man. We hear all about your errant underwires and your broken strings but I don't feel there's enough information out there about when goolies go rogue.

I may have to start a support group.

And those are the things that happened since last we spoke.

S.