Stillness

Thats what I had most of today! Plus several episodes of tears! Damn those herbs are good! As are all you blippers who have given me such good advice and support. I really do appreciate it. 
This is really not how I want to be spending my time and thoughts and energy. Having put so many positive things into my routines and taking time out from seeing people and doing things, I was really feeling quite despondent and so tired at feeling not better but worse. With  the reassurance I got from The Herbalist that how I feel is only to be expected, and with her help in talking through everything and her herbal tincture, I am feeling optimistic that I  have now turned a corner.
 So I am going to be a witness to how I am feeling, as my meditation app tells me! I am not going to dwell in the primitive mind but take all the tools I have at my disposal and in a gentle way take each moment as it comes and acknowledge but let go of the past. I think my feelings about my past job were just whipped up again by my state of mind - the anxiety feeding itself on old stresses. I  do remember having left this behind and not becoming angry all over again when I met up with past colleagues. I think Vegan Jo's experience with her boss also stirred the memories. Vegan Jo has now put in her resignation as her situation had got untenable. 
So not there yet but rewiring in progress! Bound to be a few shocks but I will not let them assume negative proportions - just a work in progress!
Thank you again for sticking with me and your support x