Resting , or playing, in peace

Last week Cathleen had to take Toots to the vet - an unusual occurrence - because his paw appeared to be tender.  He was also losing weight and had not been his usual , slightly aloof, self for some time.

It turned out he had an ingoing claw that was becoming sceptic and he was also suffering from an overactive thyroid.  The claw was cut out and thyroid medicine provided.   I thought he seemed a little bit better over the weekend though still not back to normal.

But he continued to lose weight very fast and was eating nothing at all.  He spent most of his time staring into space and not communicating.  By this morning he was very listless and clearly completely out of sorts.  Indeed he could hardly be bothered to move.   So back to the vet he went and they discovered the real problem was a massive tumour that had grown over a pound in weight in a week.  

Cathleen was with him and I was at the election count but there was little choice given his obvious suffering and weakness.  The vet felt it was unlikely he would survive an operation.

Toots has been with us for 13 years.  I was out of the Parliament when we got him and as a kitten he was a great companion for the days I worked at home.  In cold weather he would climb into my cardigan and lie there whilst I worked away at the computer.

He was a dignified, reserved cat but not afraid of much .  He enjoyed his own company but also could be very affectionate - on his terms.  He embodied Hemingway's remark that "a cat has absolute emotional honesty: human beings , for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not."   He would enjoy petting but then get tired of it.  When that happened he gave you a nip and walked off. 

When I got back from the election count I buried him and planted a new rhododendron over him - Rhododendron Polarnacht which has about as dark a flower as you can get , so highly appropriate for a very black cat.  

My main picture is of that spot as the sun begins to fade this evening.   My extra photo is a picture I took of Toots just as I left the house this morning for Lochgilphead.   I had a fear I might not seem him again.

But now he is resting - or playing, or grooming, or even nipping - in peace and lying in a place he always loved.    And though Tigear and Gizmo are very much around (and are , respectively Toot's nephew and great, great niece) he was a very special cat to me and I will miss him a lot.