Beautiful day

Seeing as I can't sleep despite being utterly shattered, I might as well write my journal...

The boys had me up early this morning wanting breakfast. Steve had a bit of a lie-in. So we had a lovely relaxed, if early, breakfast. I made the coffee strong.

Gran and Grandad arrived and after I'd done some fixes to Steve's website (mortified at how many spelling mistakes I'd missed!!) we headed out to the station to catch the train to Shoreham, to what Ben is referring to as his "new" play park, "the one with the boat". It's been such an amazingly hot and sunny day. Typical September. Tricks you into thinking the season has turned, then hits you with a heatwave. Charley slept, Ben laughed, he and Grandad played in the playpark while Gran and Steve and I sat and sweltered.

We headed over to the airport to have lunch in the cafe. I can't believe we've lived down here five years now and this is the first time we've been to the airport cafe to watch the planes!! Ben enjoyed it. It was a good choice. I had more coffee.

Had a pretty bad hypo on the way home, and to add to how rough I already felt from having not slept very well and then having a hypo, the hypofix I chose in my hypobrain state was caffeinated and on top of all the caffeine I'd already drunk it made me feel sick. Hmm. Love hypobrain.

Still, it was quite lovely seeing how happy Ben was on the train on the way home. He is loving having someone to play with! Someone who has paid attention to him all day for two days. It's showing, the effect this has had on him. No TV. Lots of play, WITH Grandad. He is not stressed! He is smiling an easy relaxed smile. He's eating and drinking well. Wish they lived closer.

Diabetic retinopathy (photos taken of the backs of my eyes) this afternoon, which meant another walk in the sun. By this time the caffeine had kicked in properly. Poor Steve. I had to bite my lips together in the end to shut myself up and STILL there was chattering going on inside my head, threatening to drive me nuts.

Wonder if my eye screening will ever not be on a crazily sunny day. Could barely see on the way home!

Home. Ben had been playing in the garden with the water, had been upstairs to get dry and changed, was on his way to the playpark but got distracted by his cars, and was making another attempt to go to the park when Steve and I got back. So he went to the playpark with G&G and we collapsed.

Bolognese for tea, and I was so shattered I gave up on pudding and went straight for a mars bar to give the insulin something useful to do. And not long after, wobbled and went to bed. Ben had a bath (assisted by Grandad) after tea and after getting dry and into pj's he cane in to go to bed. Charley had some more playtime before coming to bed.

And once they were asleep and I was not, I climbed out of bed to get a drink. Fell over things, dropped stuff, nearly smashed the water jug, spilt water, knocked things over, and decided maybe trying to paint up some more mugs tonight with the new beautiful brushes that did arrive today and did fit thru the letterbox might not be such a sensible idea. Charley had the sams thought evidently and hollered for me to come back to bed.

I think I might try and go to sleep again.

I wonder, how long does caffeine stay in your system? If you have a lot all at once does it affect you for the same length of time as a small amount, just more noticably? If you've had a bit of a caffeine overdose and gone through staring, jittering, feeling sick, chattering non-stop, and then feeling sick again as you come down, once you're no longer feeling boppy does that mean the caffeine has left your system? Because as tired as I am I can't switch off and now it's starting to bother me. Because I'm obviously not safe to leave the bed, as I've just discovered trying to get a drink!!

Hey ho.

I shall do what I tell Ben to do. Lie very still, close my eyes, and listen to my breathing and my heartbeat.

Good night one and all.

Oh and even as I write I have no idea which photo I will end up using for the blip....