At Your Convenience

If you hurry, you might manage to acquire this disused Ladies' Toilet and turn it into something at your convenience or for your convenience.

We passed this notice opposite the fire station at Tollcross this morning, and I had to smile at the wording. An entrepreneur considering privatising public toilets might stand a chance of having a profitable business given the scale of closure of street toilets in the centre of the city.

Of course some of the youth, including a few women ( not ladies) are more than happy to relieve themselves behind available trees in the adjacent Meadows, not caring a jot who sees them. Still, the elderly are often seen walking too briskly and with intent as they try to find a loo that is open without requiring them to grace a café. His Lordship is happy to pass on the knowledge that 'Bookies' Shops are a safe haven for the needy.

Despite vowing to relieve the Christmas stress by opting out of sending cards, I have had a change of heart, but have made a rod to break my back by making them and finding more and more people that I should send to.

I am heartily sick of cutting and sticking, but I think I'm finished now. Needless to say I can guess what will happen- the first card through the door will be from someone who is not going to be the lucky recipient of glitter and stick.