Welcome to Livvy

My Dear Fellow,

I was up at the crack of sparrow's fart today. Er Indoors was to go to St. John's Hospital in Livingston for a 2nd go at shooting laser beams up her nose to fix her troubled turbinates.

I feel an urge to go all Cissie and Ada when discussing health issues. Oooh, her turbinates give her all sorts of strife you know. She's a martyr to 'er turbinates, she is. The doctor was shocked when he took a look at one. He dropped his stethoscope and told her they'd have to have it off there and then. She nearly fainted.

Sorry.

I am actually sympathetic, as are you, I am sure. The three of us are the phlegm triplets and we all know the misery of a swollen nose. So I'm hoping that the procedure works this time. Apparently it was a bit more traumatic and she does seem more worn out and fragile this time. I'm glad I've taken the rest of the week off. I got word she was being discharged at 2.30, we got home about 90 minutes later and she's done nothing but sleep since then.

Before she fell asleep though, she told me a very odd story. Apparently when she first came to, a nurse asked her if she spoke a foreign language.

"Uh - no," said Er Indoors.

"Well you were chattering away to me in some lovely language when we were putting you under," said the nurse. "It was beautiful."

Er Indoors is unsure what she said. Obviously she did languages at school but has forgotten them all now. "It could have been Maori," she speculated. "Or maybe it was Shetland. It could have been f***ing eejit."

But what did I do in the period between her being taken in and her escape you may ask. Well, I explored The Centre which is the imaginatively named shopping centre about a mile from the hospital. It is a huge mall and like most huge malls contains all the shops you normally see on the high street anyway, but bigger. So it was hard to kill time there. I did my best.

It was also my Lovely Niece Two's birthday today. LN2 has just turned 16 which is a big deal. I sent her a long FB message and got a sweet reply back. The nieces are amazing, both of them incredibly smart and articulate. So anyway, I sent money because I am useless. One day I'll think of something appropriate.

Er Indoors is still sleeping. That's good. I think she needs a good long rest. The little guys are being very good and not disturbing her. I'll keep you posted.

El Parsones