Reinforcements

We've been soldiering on independently since Audrey was born refusing all offers of help. We've not even had a break for an hour. My husband has been to work but she's been by my side 24/7 since she was born. You see I'm stubbornly independent. Always have been.

My rationale for not accepting help was that we'll have to do it on our own at stage so we might as well go through the pain barrier as a family now. I also wanted to get our own routine going and feared anyone helping might not agree with our methods and well...'bugger it up' for want of a better phrase.

But when I met the NCT girls on Friday and have spoken to other Mums, there was one thing in common. They've all had help. From day one. And more to the point they've accepted any offers of help. Parents and friends have taken their babies for a few hours so they could sleep or get out the house or they've cooked and cleaned their houses to take the stress away. They said it was hard at first but they couldn't have survived without it.

After an impossibly tough weekend with Audrey, my husband made the case last night that we might be cutting off our nose to spite our face now. It's been a month. We're both 'done in'. We need help. We need a break.

My parents are being drafted in tomorrow as I have a presentation in Nottingham I have to attend. My husband's parents are coming on Thursday. Think we need to repeat something similar as often as we need it. I give in. We need reinforcements. My stupid pride will have to be quiet for once.

Put her in the sling today while I made lunch. She loved it. Like a little kangaroo in her pouch. She really is impossibly cute.