The start of a new obsession?

The men in this family can be a bit obsessive. When we get into something we tend to get into it in a big way. It's all or nothing, and it is a behaviour that comes from my dad's side of the family. Cue the Zippo lighter part works advertised on TV. A bi-weekly publication on the history of the Zippo lighter complete with a specially commissioned lighter with each copy. Now I don't smoke, never have and never will so I have about as much need of a lighter as I have of a Welsh dresser (an in joke that some of you will get). Of course, that doesn't matter one bit does it. My inner obsessive nerd is already hooked so when Matthew tells me that he is going to the shops, I ask him to buy me the first edition at the bargain price of just £4.99. I'll only buy that, just for the pleasure of owning a Zippo lighter. I won't buy any of the subsequent editions.

Did I tell you that the men in our family are obsessive? Here's the proof. Matthew came home with 2 copies of the magazine, one for him and one for me and we are both drooling over the lighters on offer in the 2nd and 3rd editions of this part work, both on offer at a reduced price. Don't worry. Yes, I do intend to buy them both but I will stop there. This is a 60 piece part work, at a full cover price of £19.99. In other words, by the end, you will have spent £1,200 on a set of lighters; crazy. Now clearly most people either stop before they reach the end but some poor saddo without my limited self control is going to be £1,200 lighter by the end (no pun intended).

If you are easily offended, do not read beyond this point.

After my 37 mile bike ride yesterday, I stripped off to get in the shower, looked down and my chin almost hit the floor. My willy had shrunk to almost nothing. It was about the size of a cocktail sausage and because the skin that normally covers its magnificent length had nowhere to go it was bunched up at the end and looked like a pickled walnut attached to the cocktail sausage that had replaced my male member. Fear not, the warm water restored it to its former glory but it makes you wonder whether this cycling lark is good for you. Another 20 miles and it would have turned itself inside out and I would have had to change my name to Terri.