Good Grief 39

Trudging on
... oh, silly me ... just like the knapweed and the grass, we do have clarity and purpose ... it is an essential part of the human condition ... to trudge on ... to just keep trudging on ....
Just as Pema Chodron says, 'Start where you are' ... and here I am ... trudging. I feel I have been trudging though for something of an eternity ... me and Sisyphus have become great mates and get to have good chats as we face each day.
'Carry on Trudging' ... I'm surprised it never became a hit classic 60's British low budget film ... a bit lacking in humour and innuendo I guess.
Coming back to Sisyphus, and Camus, of course, it is hard to know what the point of trudging is. I know that that can be said of anything. But trudging without love, connection and a feeling of everything falling away seems terribly exhausting. When my husband was ill it was often very hard ... I was just thinking this evening of how long it could take to get him up the stairs to bed at times. I remember a few times when we were just stuck on the stairs and the feeling of panic as I could sense his energy dissipating at a rate of knots and not knowing what on earth to do. Each step a mountain to climb. It could take an hour or more. I can hardly believe it now when I'm up and down in a flash now. I would happily, selfishly, return to it now though.