Good Grief 38

I find it interesting to look at a picture taken.
There are so many layers to it, so many choices made, conscious and unconscious.
They may only be a moment in our day ... a quick blip, or a much considered and crafted or re-worked with narrative layers adding depth, texture, context and meaning, etc.
Why have I taken a picture of knapweed - was it in the making long before I took it? I know I had been noticing knapweed for some time. I had thought 'it seems to be a good year for knapweed' for quite a while. So was my blip pre-determined?
It was a bleak day, poor weather. I had time off work. I'm not sure why. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Not sure what to do with time off - if I plan stuff it doesn't always work. If I don't plan stuff it doesn't always work. I have no idea what works. The effort, the energy ... I try to think of useful ways, new things, some other way of being - read, study, voluntary work, meditate, garden, ANYTHING ... just do it. I know it isn't good to keep working - it's not good practice but not working can feel dangerous. How absurd does that sound?!
At least I have noticed the knapweed. The insect life love it. The knapweed knows it's purpose. It doesn't have to think about what to do ... it just does it's thing. The human condition is so exasperating. I want to be knapweed. It feels like a Gregor Samsa moment, especially when I am almost bed bound and unable to move.
... at least I have noticed the knapweed ... and I particularly like the grass 'striking through' with a clarity and purpose ... I am jealous of it's clarity and purpose ....