Andy and more MCN girls 6th Nov 2004

That's a couple of pics with models I have posted now....but the bitter irony is I remember when, as we walked out of this shop I made some comment about him with gorgeous women, and he said something along the lines of "...only have eyes for you...."

I loved that ONFIRE t-shirt.  Pretty sure he bought it at a stand at one of the races.  His denim jacket.....I bought one, subconsciously wanting to "look right" beside him.
He looks happy here.

I'm so haunted with just how unhappy he must have been, to want out and away so desperately.  And to find happiness again with someone else.  It fills me with tremors, that single thought.  How terribly unhappy I made him.
I think of how thorough he was in taking everything away before I returned....that he obviously never wanted to have to come back....or that he perhaps thought I would never let him back (which fills me with even more sorrow).  He had a logical mind, when mine was (still is) overtaken with emotion.  Logic told him to take everything so as to not have to ask to come back and make it harder for me..........perhaps.  But the feeling of being 'ran away from' is was over-rides everything.

The picture is from happy days.  My Gorgeous man.