Guest Blip # 10 - Andrew 'Disco Diva' Richardson

Right you'll have to bear with me on this one. You see, I have so much to say and so little time. I imagine this will come out as a mish mash of words all thrown together in a nonsensical way which gives you headache. Maybe that's how my friends feel every day considering I was once described as "a tornado entering a room" and as going "from 0 to hyper in 0.63 seconds." Earlier today I even warmed my nose up on a coffee cup. But I digress...

You see, I'm a bit excited today. The type of excitement where you sit in public places dramatically mouthing words to songs on your iPod that nobody else can hear meaning you look a bit special. Yes I am doing that right now... On a train... And we all know people judge you on trains (see Tuesday hilarious blog from my housemate). Oh shit I sort of digressed again didn't I! Where was I? Oh yes me being excited. It's not because I'm about to go have cocktails, not because I've just done my last day in Bracknell, not even because I'm loving life on this train. No no, it's because I've succeeded in a task set by our very own Mr. Webb.

A few weeks ago, on this very train actually (I promise I don't have a train fetish), Paul and I set each other a challenge. To bag a date with someone we hadn't met at the time before the end of January. After a few weeks of nothing, I'm pleased to say I have succeeded. in fact I may have two! I like to excel you see. But this leaves me torn... I'm happy for me, but what about my good friend Webbo? Well that's when I got even more excited! I've decided to find him one as well!

I've got 4 days and since I'm always on them, what better place to start than on the train?! I've pulled on a train before so I'm evidence that it works (I'll consider getting help for this train fetish which I've decided I do have whilst writing this blog!) So here we are ladies and gents... Today's Blip is the first set of eligible ladies for our Paul. I feel like Cilla - Here's r Graham with a quick recap...:

PETUNIA, 26 (Top)
Glamour model Petunia loves a good Greggs. She may fall asleep on the platform but it's only cos she saves all her energy for the bedroom. The Next bag? Underwear! The other one? Massage oil! Will it be love at first sausage roll or an oily disaster of a roll off of Webb's bed?

JANE, 22 (Left)
Colour Jane likes long walks on the beach, afternoons in country parks and classical music but will sacrifice it all to live in Dudley and get a season ticket for Aston Villa. They certainly won't clash over who wears the trousers but will there be love when claret and blue hair meets claret and blue tattoo?

HECTOR, 55 (Right)
A little something different, Hector really does have it all. Not only has he adopted the sexy 'sleeping on train stance', he's also working those trousers.... The egg custard tart coloured trousers (trust me, the picture is just faded). But is Hector just one tart too far for r Paul?

Well that's it's from r Graham. Webb's Love Line has well and truly had the tables turned! Who do you guys think Paul should go on a date with? I've lined up some proper fitties as you can see and now it's up to you!

Av fun this weekend boys and girls. I'd recommend getting on a train somewhere. You never know who you might meet! God I sound like them lot who want to make love on the Northern Line. Actually I'm cured. Id never make love somewhere so dirty!