Her name is Rio,

Work was unaventfull and I have finally erradicated Moooooovvvvvvesssss LIke Jagger, out of my head after yesterdays Moooooovvvvvvesssss LIke Jagger love fest.

Totally unconnected to anything that happened at work, I would however, like to ask some questions about a certain demographic region called Wales, I'm not having a go at anyone Welsh, consider this to be more of a survey census than an attack on any part of Britain. I may ask a different census for a different part of the country at some later time, so you don't need to phone the BBC and register a complaint as if I was Clarkson or something like that.

1. Are you Employed ? - If Yes skip all further questions.
2. Are you actively seeking employment ? - If yes skip all further questions.
3. If you are not actively seeking employment, why not ?
4. When was the last time you were in gainfull employment ?
6. Would you describe your intelligence as High, Average, Low ?
7. Can you count to ten without using your fingers and toes ?
8. Can you succesfully cross the road without getting ran over ?
9. Do you feel you contribute to the gene pool in any way ?
10. Did you notice there was no Number 5, if NO return to question 7.


Anyways, back to my day in question, I would like to tell a story about a good friend of mine, for the purpose of the story I am going to disguise her name and call her, Zoe. She is married to another good friend of mine, previously referred to as Captain Chaos.

Now, Zoe, was supposed to travel to Coronation Street this morning, again I have purposefully disguised the actual destination for the purpose of the story.

However, Zoe gets a rather nice Mercedes from the hire company and although being a women, is able to appreciate a nice piece of German engineering such as the Mercedes. However, this particular aforementioned Mercedes has an automatic geabox, and Zoe is not familiar with driving an automatic gearbox but knows the basic theory.

She puts her foot on the brake, puts it into drive, but the Mercedes doesn't move anywhere. It's revving but not moving.
Hmm, being a strong, confident, intelligent women with a far better job that Captain Chaos and I, she tries to find a solution to her problem by phoning her hubby.

Captain Chaos, tells her to look for hand brakes, parking locks etc etc etc, however by this time Zoe is somewhat hacked off and decides this hire car is clearly defective.

By the time the hire car company arrives with her replacement car, a substandard Kia, made by twelve year old little Korean boys with welders and wire brushes, she realised that she hadn't taken her foot off the brake.

Long trip to Coronation Street in a Kia Rio. Well done luv', if your reading this, it definately WASN'T Captain Chaos that explained this story to me at the time that we had lunch together between 11.30 and 12.30 on Wednesday in the works canteen, so theres no point in giving him a hard time about telling me.

The next time I see her, I'm going to sing "Her name is Rio"

I hit the gym on the way home and get talking to the guy with the locker next to mine, I use locker 101, so that I can remember this number because of the hit tv series Room 101, he says that he uses locker 104, because it's twice its age. He goes onto say, but he wouldn't be able to do this in a years time. I think about this for oh about a nanosecond and smile and nod like he is correct, however this would make him currently fifty two years or age, next year he will of course by fifty three years of age, therefore he would just need to use locker 106.

He goes onto say that he is training as he is going to Acapulco for new years and wants to look buff for the ladies on the beach. Nice one mate, with a bit of luck your prowess with the ladies is better than your ability to count.

I hit the showers and throw my towel over the shower door and just as I am washing my hair, realise that there is some sort of motiff on the towel I have, the part that is draped over the door, so therefore facing the external changing room. Suddenly realisation kicks in when it dawns on me that it's the bairns Winnie the Pooh towel.

However, the sock monster has mysteriously returned yesterday's missing socks which is a bonus, so I travel home.

On the way home, I hear that tomorrow there is to be a code red, extreme weather warning as they are expecting it to be windy at 3.00pm precisely.

On arriving home, Dad, Eric and Kaye are here, John arrives wearing an outfit almost entirely coloured in beige, for which I give him a hard time. He is looking dapper as usual and I think that he would make a good male model for Saga, Age concern or be the new face of Stairmaster. Well done mate, youve become the man at BHS.