This is me - I am who I am.

I feel this journal may help people to understand that I'm not just a moany git.

I am me, I am human, like every other human I go through rough times, there are many days where I wake up and allow my emotions to get the better of me.

I have a lot on my plate. I always have. I have a 3 year old son, I have for the past 3 years been in full time education studying photography, I have a part time job, I have a house to uphold, and like everyone else i have bills to pay which leads to me having constant worries about money.

I struggle to make ends meet, I deal with the stress of having to do this all alone. I have no other half to pick up my slack, I haven't for the last 2 years. I have nobody to come home and vent to. I have nobody to discuss my true problems with. This isn't to say people don't try and help me with my problems. I just cant discuss my true problems with these people.

I bust my gut day in day out producing work for my studies, ensuring my son has a father figure to play with and learn from, I work every weekend from morning till night. After each day of hard work I come home to clean, cook and do more studies.

I'm not a popular guy, I don't have a long list of close pals who I can ask to give me a wee bit of help.

I sit in my house every night staring at the walls, on 3 and a half nights of the week I'm lucky enough to have my son here to keep me company. The other 3 and days I'm mixing between seeing other half, sitting in on my own and occasionally going out skating with my friends.

I try my hardest to put a smile on regardless of how bad I feel on the day and what problems may be occurring, so please please please forgive me for the occasion where I find it just a little too hard to smile at you when you need me to.

It's very hard to always care about others feelings when all your ever wishing is people to maybe once just think about yours...