Moments You Remember All Your Life

Old friends are the most precious of things Paul and I had in common when we got together. We had walked the same streets, participated in the same choir, hung out with the same people, even at the same time, but as much as our lives and our stories overlapped, it was many years before we joined our lives as one.

This is difficult to put into words, especially while trying to be brief. I will refer to February 11th, last Friday, because on that day, I remembered it as the anniversary of the passing of significant people in both our lives. What I didn't know until tonight, was that the same day was the passing for a very special friend, Phil Davison.

My first memory of Phil was of him talking me into joining a small musical group at the college, a quartet, I think. He was a perfectionist in so many things, yet so unpretentious. I didn't know when I met him of his great talent as an artist, this painting being a draft that he was going to throw away until Paul expressed his admiration, so he gave it to him.

Paul and I were in a small group of people who gathered weekly to share a meal and sing some songs around the piano, Phil was there.

Phil lived with Paul while he carefully and precisely built an adorable little cottage that he lived in and where his life ended last Thursday.

Phil was very knowledgeable about antiques and conducted estate sales. I saw him often at my uncle's antique store and he knew my grandmother (the one who also passed away on Feb. 11th)

The interconnections of our lives are numerous. I saw Phil walking in front of his house last week, the first time I had seen him in a few years, I thought of him, I said a prayer, but I went on to work, making a mental note that we really need to get together with him soon.

It's times like this that keep motivating me to be proactive and do the things that I think of as soon as possible if they're worth doing. I can't tell you why, but Paul and I have both thought about and talked about getting together with Phil for our entire marriage, but we haven't done it. I try to avoid regrets, but this is one I can't avoid. I know we never could have made it 'old times' again, and the fact that we were all single then, and now Paul and I are married, seemed a little awkward to me, but I think this is one time I wish I had crashed through my apprehensions and reached out a hand to an old friend.

April 22, 1950 - February 11, 2011 doesn't seem long enough.