Monday: Property Available......Or Not

This is another old sign in our area that has survived the passages of time.  On one side of it, there is a taxi firm, on the other, a sad French restaurant, with pink tablecloths, that never has anyone in it.  In other words, not the type of establishments where you would feel confident enquiring about property.  Out of sheer devilment, though, I would love to go in to the taxi firm and have a conversation along these lines:

Me; I'd like a room please.
Taxi firm: We don't have rooms.
Me: But the sign says you do.
Taxi firm: You can have a taxi, not a room.
Me: But.....
Taxi firm: Go away, mad woman!
Me: I'm reporting you to the trades description act type people!

Wander off next door and have similar conversation with French restaurant.