B drove me around to look at the Christmas lights. I was crying that day because I realized my mom wouldn't be seeing the lights. She loved to drive around on Xmas eve and look at all the lights. We would drive around our small town and do that. It's a bit different in Toronto. I don't even think I realized that the lights were on and put up. It was when I left Toronto that I saw how many houses had lights. Then I thought of Mom.
Sigh. It gets easier. I am always still surprised when I start crying out of the blue. What can you do? Remembering your family is the best even when it hurts.