A Wintertime Romance...

The Pigeon and the Lawnmower.

A Pigeon fell in love with a Lawnmower.
Don't ask me why.
But she came to visit him every night
when she flew down from the sky.

Now this happened in Wintertime
when Lawnmower lived in a shed
Pigeon would snuggle up and kiss his metal sides
as they lay on his wooden bed.

And Pigeon was very happy
right up until the Spring:
Then came that dreadful, dreadful event
that was to change everything.

She flew home very eagerly that day
after a hard time at work
it was then that she saw Lawnmower out walking
with a Blonde woman in a skirt.

Pigeon went mad with jealousy.
She attacked Lawnmower in a violent passion:
Screaming, " You two-timing, no-stroke Honda.
How dare you treat me in this unfaithful fashion."

But Lawnmower just kept moving
leading the Blonde woman along the grass
and this is how the carnage
quickly came to pass.

Lawnmower rode right over Pigeon,
she was chopped to feathers and bone,
then her blood went into his engine
and Lawnmower died with a moan.

And the Blonde who had been pushing him
was covered with grass, oil and gore.
This home-breaking horticultural hussy lay howling,
" No more gardening. No more gardening. No more."


The Moral of this story:

If you see a handsome Lawnmower
and your heart grows ever fonder
remember what happened to poor Pigeon
because she loved that wicked Honda.