heartbroken.

i woke up at mikes house and he left for IOA with salva, vito, and lam. so i left after me and britt stopped talking and went home took a shower went to dollar tree, big lots, and walmart but, couldnt find what i wanted. then we got home and i started studying and reading my hw, and then ate and left and picked up aundre for our group meeting and meet at panera bread. then i went home and hung out and then went to mikes and when i turned in my truck wouldnt turn so i got mike and john out to check the truck, they thought it was the oil but, when i left it still didnt work anyways me and mike were talking and he was like "i just want you to know i love you but, im not in love with you" and then he goes are you mad? and i was like no . then i acted like i didnt care but, i get were he is coming from because its only been about two months.. but, um i'm hurt definietly. im tearing up while writing this because i feel that i am. and his sister who is super annoying was like oh i wasnt really in love with john till we moved in blah blah i like her but, sometimes she can be so aggravating. so, yea idk when i said i love you it was like "im in love with you" and for him it was like "i love you as a person"
i feel gay because i've said that a couple of times but, he would just ignore it so now it all makes sense..