Nasty Little Cabbages

I hate Brussel Sprouts. I know its irrational and illogical but I can't stand them. Just seeing them in my kitchen, in my colander makes me want to throw up. I can't stand the smell, or their sliminess or their green faced smugness.

It all stems back from my childhood you see. My Mum always used to make us try one or two of the vile bar stewards with Sunday lunch. I always thought they were some evil alien out of a sci fi movie and no way was i going to eat them.

Anyway one Sunday I thought up a cunning plan (I was pretty young), I pretended to eat them while actually shoving them in my cheeks. Now I must have been pretty young because a) I could stuff a sprout in each cheek and I was chubby enough that no one noticed and b) I was too young to think of a place I could get rid of them without my Mum spotting them.

It wasn't until bedtime when I had to clean my teeth that the filthy green vegges were discovered still hiding in my cheeks. After that we stopped getting them on our Sunday dinner, but by then the damage was done.

Please send the filthy, yucky, green, nasty vicious little devil cabbages to room 101!

Don't like cabbages much either, if there's room.