plenty and too much

2am.

The birds are still sleeping.
There seem to be more cars hissing by my window than normal however. Let's see.
Yesterday's report: I had every intention of going to the studio in the morning as usual. I went for a walk and did all my usual morning things, and then suddenly felt very tired. I just couldn't get out the door. The sun was beautiful and the breeze was perfect. At 10:30 in the morning rather than leaving my house, I got back in bed and fell asleep until 1:00!!

Very strange to take a nap in the morning, I guess I really was tired. I made it to the studio by 2 (I really don't know why I even went at that point). Checked in with a few studio mates, left by 4 and then finished my taxes. Made the deadline.

I had BBQ tofu and brown rice for dinner, watched a popular television show on the computer that made me squirm with embarrassment. I really wish auto-tune had not been invented. That perfectly pitched robot edge to one's voice is not something I would strive for. Sometimes I think we are all turning into cyborgs. Never mind...

Went to sleep at 9:30 and here I am, up at 2:30. The last glimpse of a dream I can remember, is being out of body and floating over my art in my studio. Seeing it from above, like a ghost. Great.

I didn't drink as much water as I should have yesterday, and they put the Tzatziki
(dairy based) sauce on my falafel. But oh well I am trying, doing the best I can, I think. Although I don't know if I am ever really doing the best I can. Sometimes I think that saying is a cop out or a free pass. Trying to be kinder to myself, middle path, middle path, middle path....

I decided to take a two week break from face book, until May. So, I temporarily deactivated my account. I tell myself, I primarily use face book for maintaining relationships in the business and promoting my work, but mostly I seem to play music videos that suddenly I feel everyone must hear. I just wonder about my motivation, so I canned it for a while. I already miss that strange connection with the 550 or so people, reading about what they are eating, making, selling, reading. When did we become this society of voyeurs and almost incapable of doing anything without an audience?

It was actually blip that made me take a break, I noticed my year ago photograph from a couple of days ago was where I was taking a break from all social networks. Happy to report that three of the things I had to take a break from last year are no longer on my plate at all, eventually I quit twitter, myspace, and shut down one of my older blogs. I am still on the computer plenty and too much.

Yesterday evening, the sun and breeze were again perfect. Even though it was not raining, I was very tempted to dance the way Gene Kelly does in Singing in the Rain. I even jumped up on the base of a light pole, and then I spied a person walking towards me, so I jumped down. I closed my eyes, I tilted my head to the left, and the warm flower scented wind rushed by. I smiled at the sensation. I was still dancing in a musical in my mind and if I kept my eyes closed I could be any one and any where I wanted.

I live in dreams...