Rapier Wit

This was a present from napoleon our first Christmas together. I actually did ask for a letter opener, he wasn't just being "lamo" boyfriend who could only think to buy his girlfriend a letter opener. He bought it two nights before Christmas in the crazy swords and wierd armour shop on the Royal Mile just below the castle. When he went in the place was full of tourists and the guy working there looked utterly bored. When asked "Do you have any letter openers?", he was shown the standard fare by the lackey. But then napoleon asked "Um, do you have anything tackier?", and the wee guys face lit up with wild eyed enthusiasm, clearly thrilled to have something to break the monotony of his evening!

The result is the beauty you see before you, resting proudly on our bureau.