Pantomime!

I was at two pantomimes today!
The first occurred even before I got into work! Had given an acquaintance a lift into Oban. She works further down the town & I work just at the back entrance into Oban. "just drop me off here" says she at the top of the brae "oh it's fine I will drop you off at Tescos" says I. Just as I was passing the roundabout I espied a cop car lurking but drove on. Parked up at said Tesco when who should pull up alongside but the bloody cop cart! Out gets two of Argyll's finest, caps on & come over to the car. "step out the car mam" says a cop so young looking he didn't even have hair on his arms let alone anywhere else!
Out we both get, at this point I thought my passenger is going to leg it out of here leaving me looking like her hapless accomplice, but fair game to her she stay ed with me to observe the ensuing pantomime!
The eagle eyed plods had spotted my sidelight wasn't working! Anyhow the older cop says "switch on your lights mam" of course I switch the lights on and nothing happens! I think Crap! they are all out, I know the wee one was out but now I was thinking feck I'm about to be booked here. Then old cops says "perhaps mam would like to turn her engine on so the lights might work!! At this point I'm thinking it's not just the damn lights that are dim!
Anyhow after a bit of faffing, the prepubescent cop starts asking me for my details. Name, age, DOB then I thought he asked place of work so I duly replied such & such school!!! My fellow passenger who had heard the actual question properly (place of birth!) was by this time doubled up laughing so too was the older cop who knew that the complex I had just mentioned was only 7 years old, )I know I'm young looking but that one I couldn't pull off, in the meantime toy boy cop still wrote down my first answer (he will go far that one, the lights were on but no one was home!)
Eventually senior cop says to babyface plod you have to caution the lady!
At this point my passenger tried to make light of the situation & asked what were we to do with our redundant tax discs (I could have thought of a few rude suggestions but all would have had me arrested) Then she burst out with more laughter saying " This is where I should whip out my camera and do a Blip" Im thinking Holy Mother now we ARE about to be arrested because all that sounded mighty iffy especially to both of Argyll's finest who had never heard of this word BLIP!
Finally after being cautioned & given the proverbial pink slip to take to a garage they departed leaving my passenger & I having a good laugh about the whole episode while the wee guy collecting the Tesco trollies thought we were well & truly off our trollies!
The second pantomime was the above one! Not half as funny as the first I have to add1