Hard times

This has been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I wish I could say that it is the last or was the worst but my fear is it is only the beginning. I know this will be a roller coaster, I just hope the tracks can hold. I don't want to go but I may not have a choice. I don't want to fail...I want to try every option before I do something drastic. I hope that's his feelings too. I feel depression taking hold, I've thought of ways to end it but I think of this precious guy and my mom and that feeling flies away. If I exist for only for her love and his smile I've done my job. I will be strong.