Ok, so, you spend hours swapping socks from bag to bag to try to get the size/weight ratio exact. Then you discover that the queue you have joined is not the priority for families travelling with children queue but is the queue of people who have paid the two quid priority boarding fee. So you try to find out where the queue for families is, only to discover that there is no longer any sort of priority boarding apart from the two quid queue. You think "I'm not joining in THAT rip-off", then you look behind you and realise EVERYONE on the plane has paid the two quid (which does render it somewhat pointless, unless you are an Irish Airline owner that is), so you leave the kids in the queue (as you were quite near the start) and leg it back to the place where you glibly turned down the priority boarding pass half an hour earlier. Then you take your flight, all goes well and it is surprisingly comfortable (must be all the two quids going back into the system) and you get off at the other end and wait for your luggage. The motorised shutter opens and some bloke in a boiler suit with a moustache pulls up in a cart and chucks the bags onto the belt till it's full and then he waits. And waits. And waits. Until a bright spark on the passenger side realises that it's not a conveyor belt in the 'airport' sense, but a set of rollers which require said passengers to move the bags along manually. It is only of a certain length though so if you are not there to take your bag it just gets pushed to the end and falls in a heap on the floor.

So, they take your money, twice, and then get yu to do all the work at the other end!

They'll be getting us to flap our wings next!