Watching and waiting

I stood outside, being hassled by monst'rous, hungry shite-flies, poised with the camera in the forlorn hope of catching the elusive 'green flash'.

Having flapped my arms wildly around my head and exhausted my lexicon of profanities in an attempt to avoid getting converted into a goo that the little gits can get their proboscises stuck into, this is all I got.

If I don't turn into Jeff Goldblum overnight then it'll have been a complete 'n' utter waste of bloomin' time.