It can only get better

Another miserable day for the spotty babe. He was so fed up and didn't know what to do with him self sitting there grizzling that I grabbed his pillow and lay it down, he lay down and looked at me with a 'I'm sick and unhappy' face.

Mum has been here today and even he grizzled and was restless with her, he's not feeding for long before he starts to sob and everything is worth crying about. I love him and I've been trying so hard to comfort him but oh i can't wait for this to be over.

Doesn't help that because andre has been his main carer over the weekend while sick that harper was pining for him today and when he came home until he went to bed was all smiles and giggles, he even played chase and ate for andre. Andre is a very calm relaxed kinda guy and I think harper feeds off his soothing energy.

Kanye was home today he had more seizures this morning and choked a bit again on his saliva, when I spoke to the neurology nurse she said when he's on his back he can't swallow his tongue or choke on it but it is a muscle so if it relaxes can block his throat.

I don't know why but every time he has a lot of seizures like he has had recently I'm always surprised when I realize he's sick. And I know it's typical for him to get sick again within two weeks of having something else, i guess I thought his seizures a few weeks back when he hit his head then had chicken pox was it but really his seizures back then were his typical every 5 week seizures and now he has a chest infection that falls within the 2 week range of the pox which I keep forgetting is a virus.

Kanyes been coughing, has runny nose and has a rattly chest. I'm not sure if I'll take him to get antibiotics yet, he's been on a lot in his lifetime and it makes me feel like it's doing more harm as some interfere with epilepsy meds. I'll see how he goes.

I'm super tired today i really feel it. I was talking to another mum who has 4 boys under 6 and she said it's been non stop they've had gastro bug and chicken pox too and she's tired. Holidays start at the end of this week and we've had something since beginning of term 9 weeks ago. I am pleased with how warm this winter has been though and to be fair the kids haven't been sick just the pox which they'll never have again so I can't complain too much I guess just being needed all the time on little sleep gets to you after a while. I love my babies though and I said today if I can make them better by doing/being what they need then i will .

For now I will live on coffee and coconut water