A Bird's Place is NOT in the Kitchen

That's not an anti-sexist statement. It's just an observation that the only place for a pigeon in the kitchen is in a pigeon pie (and that's alienated another segment of society).

Eventually, I managed to shepherd the pigeon to the open window, as it was beating its head to a pulp trying to exit through the glass. Try it in a cottage next time, Walter!

That's enough pie references. I'm just a tad unhappy it managed to knock over the gin bottles spilling the run-out water I'd collected for use on the plants. And chipped my favourite water jug that I'd picked up from Andalucia in 1990.